Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
