I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
