I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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