We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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