Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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