this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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