Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
