is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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