My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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