he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
My life is pants optional.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
