We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
