Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
