wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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