I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
