I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
