Its about making memories worth repressing
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize