he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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