But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Randomize