I'm gonna have a badass scar
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Randomize
