i just wanna soil my oats bro
Jerry, you need to find god
I wish you could order shots online.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
