He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
