Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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