wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
