Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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