is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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