Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize