What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Randomize
