Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
