sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Randomize