what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
