Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
