I got chris browned last night
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
