covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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