The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
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