I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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