Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
