oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize