you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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