And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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