there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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