I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
