I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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