office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
