So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
