Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
