yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
