i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
