I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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