I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
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