If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Randomize
