I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
