you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize